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Bonnie ENGSTROM, a free-lance writer and former newspaper columnist, lives in Southern California with, Dave, her psychologist husband of forty years and Jake the Dawg, their Miniature Pinscher. They are "major animal lovers" who have owned seven cats and Luciano Pavarotti, a masked lovebird.
From the time her first child was in Kindergarten until the last one graduated from high school, she devoted over twenty-five years to public education as a PTA volunteer, serving as president at three schools and two terms as a council president. She also co-founded a parent cooperative preschool and established a Parent, Teacher, Student Association at an independent study high school. Her husband was known many times to raise his eyebrows and ask, "So, when do you start getting paid?"
Her greatest joy was raising her children, baking fancy, theme birthday cakes until three a.m. and planning unique parties for them and their friends. She is now the proud mother of three grown children, the pieces of her heart walking around outside her body.
Loren, the eldest at 35, is a network administrator for an international construction company. Bonnie owes her computer literacy to Loren whom she used to call frequently when he was a student at Northern Arizona University where he "walked her through" the computer's intricacies over the phone line. Several years ago, Loren built a custom computer for his mom. He is the only techie Bonnie and Dave call, sometimes driving computers to Arizona, sometimes having him come home for a weekend to defrag hard drives and install programs. Loren is the quiet, practical one.
 Brian, the middle child, the "filling in the sandwich" at 34, can't tear himself away from Newport Beach's sun and surf. As a young man, he aimed for a career acting in film and television. Winning an international modeling competition in New York City while covered from head to toe with chicken pox, he spent a summer doing shoots in Germany. He received his B.A. at the University of California at Irvine and his M.B.A. from its Graduate School of Management. After working a few years for others, his entrepreneurial streak took hold. He now owns his own mortgage company in Irvine. If you want to re-finance your home, Brian is the man to call. (insert photo?) His love for pushing the envelope ~ riding motorcycles, surfing high waves ~ makes Brian the risk-taker of the family.
Dana, 29, is the baby and the "miracle child". Bonnie remembers "informing" God that if her third child was another boy, she would surely jump off the Newport Pier. Either God believed her, or he graciously bestowed her heart's desire for a daughter.
 Dana married James McCarthy May of 2002, blending their Swedish and Irish heritages, in a ceremony that is still being talked about for its beauty and the fact that Dana vowed to "Love, honor and obey", as her mother did forty years ago.
A psychology major who graduated Cum Laude from Arizona State University, she accepted the only job she could find in a waning job market. An unexpected blessing, it led in two and a half years to her promotion of Associate Director of Student Services for the University of Phoenix Online, Military Division, overseeing the education of 25,000 students. James preempted her when he graduated Summa Cum Laude from ASU just two weeks before their wedding. Jim also works for UOP Online as a Counseling Services Manager. He is a major, major Anaheim Angels fan. (Don't ask! Well, okay ~ almost fanatical.) They live in Scottsdale, Arizona about thirty-five minutes from Loren and Jen. Brian always said that Dana is the glue that holds the family together.
Dana and Jim recently gave Dave and Bonnie a special gift - debut  status as Grandma and Grandpa. You might have heard Bonnie shouting from the rooftops when Taylor Mary Morgan McCarthy entered this temporal world.
Her Uncle Brian thinks she is the most beautiful baby in the world. (He's got an eye for the ladies.)
Bonnie and Dave are blessed to own a small condominium a mile from Dana and Jim's. Traveling both by air and car, they manage to spend a lot of time in Arizona visiting Dana, Jim, Loren and Jennifer. They plan to move there eventually, especially to spend time with Taylor. In preparation, Dave has reinstated his psychologist license for Arizona. It will be hard to give up their family home of 34 years in Newport Beach that overlooks a nature park with a running stream, especially for Bonnie whose den window is merely feet from it. Her writing may take an entirely different turn in a desert state.
Dave, Dana, James, Bonnie |
Dave: How does one describe a husband? I remember him as a tall, skinny, shy blonde student at George Washington University. I remember he had a lock of hair that drifted onto his moist forehead as I walked down the aisle.
Now, he is graying, very distinguished looking. He is self-conscious smiling in photos (LOL), but no trouble smiling at me every morning. The newspaper is waiting for me each morning on the counter. The dog has been fed, and he helps make the bed. He has provided for our family all our married life, and for that, I am especially blessed. He has grit his teeth and rolled his eyes, but said nothing when I was still laying out PTA newsletter copy on the kitchen counter at three a.m.; when I rushed to meetings at seven p.m. leaving a dinner warming in the microwave for him; when I am glued to my computer to monitor my Online prayer chain.
He has been my brick, my cheerleader, my stable strength, and now, my understanding and patient supporter while I write and he cooks dinner. My husband still does not fully understand what I write or why I write it. Although I have offered and suggested, he has never read a word I've written. Perhaps that is best. He is the scientist, and I am the romantic. I have never attended a workshop, lecture, support group or speech he has given. It's been an unspoken trust between us to simply accept and silently applaud.
Both of us are only children and raised to be independent. I count that and our loving relationship as one of God's ultimate blessings to us. I also don't mind the occasional bouquet of roses that grace the kitchen counter some mornings. I smell their fragrance and praise God for this man.
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